What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
Last Updated: 21.06.2025 08:29
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
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Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Why do men say women hit the wall at 24?
TEXT:
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
What should I do to get over a relationship?
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
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Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
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Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Make Nazis afraid again!
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Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
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And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
What transforms the philosophical intellect?
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
What is the most unwatchable movie you have sat through?
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)